Why I Love Steven Novella

I will admit to feeling the vaguest hint of schadenfreude when I witness an artfully executed sceptical smackdown. This is one such.

Scam Alert! Scepticism in Real Life

The missus and I are in the market for a vehicle, and we were perusing the classifieds when we happened upon a car that looked just perfect. It was located in Brandon, MB, but we figured that we could make the drive out there to see it on the weekend. So the missus contacted the seller. Unfortunately, a few things came up.

I have posted the full exchange below, highlighting the "red flags" in red, and removing any of my wife's identifying information (this is my blog, not hers). Be careful out there, folks! If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Check out http://www.fightthescams.com/ for more things to watch out for.

Date: Sat, Jan 23, 2010 at 12:38 PM
Subject: Important Sales Lead from AutoTrader
From: Carol S <carol_simmons@msn.com>
To: [REDACTED]

Hi there,

I am contacting you about the 2003 Toyota Camry I advertised for sale on autotrader. I just passed trough a divorce, and I am very glad that I took the car, because it was my husband's most precious thing, his pride.

Here are a few details about the car:

The car is safety inspected , certified and it has only 147,000 KM. 4 Door, 2 Wheel Drive, Automatic Transmission, Front Wheel Drive, Alloy Wheels, New Tires, Premium Wheels, Spoiler, Air Conditioning, Bucket Seats, Center Console, Cruise Control, Leather Seats, Power Door Locks, Power Mirrors, Power Steering, Power Windows, Rear Defrost, Tilt Steering, Tinted Windows, Alarm, CD Player, Information Center, Keyless Entry, Stereo/Tape, Trip/Mileage Computer, Antilock Brakes, Driver Air Bag, Passenger Air Bag, the Air Conditioning (A/C) is in good working order and blows cold. The brakes are in good working order, it drives straight on the highway with no tire vibration. The exterior is in excellent condition with no dings or chips (only a few very small chips on the front bumper, you will see them in the pictures I attached), it is way much cleaner than you would expect for a car of its age & mileage.The paint is in excellent overall condition and shows deep shine. The interior is in excellent condition. No liens, no accidents, I have the title in hand.

The lowest I am willing to take for it is $4,350. It may sound amazing, but it truly is an outstanding deal. I don't ask to much for the car because I just want to get rid of it ASAP, since the bastard used it to take his girlfriend out on dates. It is bad memory and I should get rid of it. I would probably donate the money from the car to the red cross, as it seems the best solution since I don't need the bastard's money.

A totally rust, corrosion and flood free car. Never been in any accidents.Where are you located?

If you have any further questions please do not hesitate to ask!

Best Regards,
Carol Simmons

PS: Please scroll down to see a few more pictures with the car!

No real red flags there. I was honestly really excited at this point: that's a fantastic price for exactly the car we're looking for, and it's always nice to help someone move on after an unpleasant experience, isn't it?

This is why scepticism is important. Think. Don't just trust your instincts.

Date: Sat, 23 Jan 2010 12:46:14 -0600
Subject: Re: Important Sales Lead from AutoTrader
From: [REDACTED]
To: carol_simmons@msn.com

Hi Carol,

The car looks fantastic. It really is what my husband and I are looking for. We are in Winnipeg. Do you come out here at all? We would really like to see it as soon as possible. Alernatively, we could come out to Brandon to see it. Let me know what works for you. You can also call me at [REDACTED].

Thanks, we look forward to hearing from you,
[REDACTED]

Date: Sat, Jan 23, 2010 at 12:54 PM
Subject: Re: Important Sales Lead from AutoTrader
From: Carol S  <carol_simmons@msn.com>
To: [REDACTED]

Hi again,

I am located in Yukon and eBay offered me a great opportunity to use their Protection Services which I think is the safest under the current circumstances. I am very busy with my job and the best solution for me would be to make things trough eBay and for that I will need the following information from you:

- Full Name
- Full Shipping Address
- Phone #

After I will receive these details from you, I will forward them to eBay; they will process all the information (your info, my info, vehicle info) and the will contact us both with additional information.

After the transaction will start we will both receive further instructions about it including payment invoice and bill of sale, you will need to pay to eBay, eBay will give me the shipping instructions to send the car over, I will ship the car to your address, you will receive it and then you will have 5 days in which to inspect it, drive it and check its documents before actually deciding to keep it. During all this time eBay will hold the money in their trust account. If you will be satisfied with the car and will decide to keep it then you will inform eBay about this so they will release the money to me. If the car is not as I described it and you will decide not to keep it then eBay will refund your payment in full, no questions asked and shipping back the car will be my concern. Please take into consideration that I will get paid only after you receive the car and make sure everything is as agreed. I think this is fair for the both of us.

Let me know if you wish to go ahead and buy my car!

Thanks a bunch,
Kindly,
Carol

She's located in Yukon? That's not Brandon... Also, since when does eBay offer people the opportunity to use their services. What does that even mean? I assumed that all of this about eBay holding the money in trust, etc., referred to PayPal, but in hindsight that was a little suspicious, too, as eBay is not an escrow company. Finally, and this may seem like a bit of pop-psych fluff, but if she were selling the pride and joy of her ex-husband, for whom she apparently has nothing but venom and vitriol, would she really refer to it as her car?

Date: Sat, 23 Jan 2010 13:17:30 -0600
Subject: Re: Important Sales Lead from AutoTrader
From: [REDACTED]
To: carol_simmons@msn.com

Hi Carol,

I just wanted to clarify a few things about this type of transaction. Who is responsible for paying the shipping costs to get the car to Winnipeg? How much would this be? Also, how will the car be shipped (will it be driven down, put on a trailer, put on a train?). When would we be able to start the process and approximately how soon could we expect the car to arrive? My husband has an eBay account and he is wondering if this would help the process at all?

Thanks Carol,
[REDACTED]

From: Carol S 
Date: Sun, Jan 24, 2010 at 2:44 PM
Subject: RE: Important Sales Lead from AutoTrader
To: [REDACTED]

[REDACTED], the car has been inspected and tested. I sent the car, the keys and all additional documents to the shipping company. they have already packed it and the documents in a container and are waiting for the okay from the e-bay.

They verified the car's documents and my documents to make sure I am the car's legal owner and that the car can be registered to anyone over here in Canada, after verifying the documents an eBay representative checked out the car's condition to make sure it is as I've described it.All the documents will arrive to your address with the car and you will have 5 days to check and test the car.

Please let me know after you will hear from eBay because I need to know for sure if this is a done deal!

  Waiting news from you! Best Regards,
 Carol

P.S. I don't think you need to worry about the shipping because eBay quoted me with a great price offer trough one of their trusted companies and I decided to include the shipping in the car's price.

"Over here in Canada"? We're both in Canada, aren't we? And how did we get from working out the details to having the car packed for shipping?

From: "eBay VPP" <checkout@vpp-escrow-service.net>
Date: Mon, 25 Jan 2010 00:55:00 +0400
To: [REDACTED]
Subject: eBay Motors Request - 2003 TOYOTA CAMRY

eBay sent this message to " [REDACTED]" Your name is included to show this message originated from eBay.

  Dear [REDACTED],

     This message comes in return of your request regarding the 2003 TOYOTA CAMRY belonging to Mrs Carol Simmons.  

  Before the current vehicle is approved for selling using our services the seller needed to take it to a shipping company working in partnership with eBay Motors® and Carfax® in order for an engineer to verify the actual condition. Our department has received copies of the seller's ID, copies of the vehicle documents because we needed to make sure the person selling this vehicle is it's  legal owner, there are no outstanding debts against this vehicle. After the documents verification ended our department instructed a representative of the shipping company to personally inspect the vehicle in order for us to make sure that it's condition matches the seller's description. 

  Since the number of online transactions is growing each year we need to take more precautions in order to offer highest quality services to our customers because eBay VPP wishes to become the number one escrow/transaction mediation company therefore  we need to make sure that any transaction guaranteed by our department will be completed without any complications.

   In order to become the registered buyer of this vehicle please provide our department with the following information:

         - Full name
         - Delivery address (required for vehicle shipping)
         - Telephone number

 Please confirm the receival of this e-mail and advise!

Thank you for using eBay!

Sincerely,
Customer Support (Trust and Safety Department).
2010 eBay Inc.

The formatting of the "eBay" email is a huge giveaway. Also, the eBay email address doesn't even come from eBay! What kind of pathetic spoofing attempt is this? And "Your name is included to show this message originated from eBay"? In what way does that show that the email originated from eBay? What? And to top it all off, they used the word "receival". Which isn't a word. Sigh.

And there you have it. I reported the email to spoof@ebay.com. Caveat emptor.

---

Edit: I temporarily took this post down after I received a response from the message I sent to eBay regarding this exchange. I've posted this exchange below for your amusement (be ready to plant your palm firmly in your face).

From: eBay Customer Support - spoof <spoof@ebay.com>
Date: 2010/1/24
Subject: RE: Fwd: Fw: eBay Motors Request - 2003 TOYOTA CAMRY (KMM17313721I15977L0KM)
To: Gem Newman <[REDACTED]>

Hello,

The email you received is genuine and came from us.

The reason you're receiving emails like this one is because of the notification preferences you selected. To change your account preferences, please follow these steps:

1. Click "My eBay" located at the top of most eBay pages. You may need to sign in.
2. Hold your cursor over the "My Account" tab so that the drop-down menu appears, and select "Preferences."
4. Scroll down to "Newsletters, Promotions and Event Notifications." Click the "Show" link on the right, and then click the "Edit" link. You may be asked to sign in again.

To receive a notification, select the check box next to it. If you don't want the notification, clear the check box by clicking it again. Repeat for every type of notification you want to change.

5. Click the "Save" button.

***Important***
eBay will never ask for your personal information in an email or include a link that takes you directly to a page where you are asked to sign in.


Remember that you can always check the My Messages section of My eBay to see if a message from us is legitimate. Copies of any emails we send you about the status of your account or a change in your account information will be displayed in My Messages. This is especially helpful since many spoof emails try to convince you that your account is in jeopardy.

If you'd like to take a brief tutorial on how to spot a spoof email, go to:

http://pages.ebay.com/help/tutorial/accountprotection/js_tutorial.html

Keep those reports of suspicious emails coming -- you're helping protect the global Internet community! Our Trust & Safety team works closely with Internet Service Providers to shut down fraudulent sites. We also send your reports to Web browser companies so that they can develop
tools to identify phishing sites."


Sincerely,
eBay Trust & Safety Team

Well, that certainly came from eBay. Am I perhaps guilty of being too sceptical? My incredulous response:

From: Gem Newman
Date: 2010/1/24
Subject: Re: Fwd: Fw: eBay Motors Request - 2003 TOYOTA CAMRY (KMM17313721I15977L0KM)
To: eBay

So you're saying that "checkout@vpp-escrow-service.net" is an eBay email address?

Gem Newman
Lead Developer
[REDACTED]
[REDACTED]

So perhaps I ought to proceed with the transaction. After all, eBay gave it the okay! And then today, I receive this:

From: eBay Customer Support - rswebhelp <rswebhelp@ebay.com>
Date: 2010/1/26
Subject: RE: SP91022 your recent report to eBay's Trust and Safety Department (KMM15387111I15977L0KM)
To: Gem Newman <[REDACTED]>

Dear Gem,

Thank you for writing eBay in regard to your concern with the authenticity of the message you received from "checkout@vpp-escrow-service.net" about a vehicle.

Gem, I apologize for the confusion brought by the automated response, the email address "checkout@vpp-escrow-service.net" does not belong to eBay Motors. I can confirm that the email that you received is a spoof, also known as a "phishing," email. I suggest not to follow through with the transaction. Our Trust & Safety team is working to disable any websites it links to.

eBay does not act as an escrow service and is not responsible in handling transactions between the seller and the winning bidder. eBay will never hold money or item on behalf of an auction nor ship or store vehicle in an "eBay warehouse. So there is no eBay agent/representative that holds payment on behalf of seller nor buyers. eBay does not work that way. You must bid and win the item listed on eBay Motors to be eligible for Vehicle Purchase Protection Program.

Please be aware that eBay discourages all transactions, which are initiated by parties other than the seller and the winning buyer in a completed eBay listing. Sales that take place outside of eBay carry a potential fraud risk and are not eligible for eBay services, including feedback, contact information requests, and the eBay Standard Purchase Protection Program. You can review the services provided through the eBay Standard Purchase Protection Program at:

http://pages.ebay.com/help/tp/isgw-buyer-protection-steps.html

In addition, we do not recommend the use of instant cash wire transfer services such as Western Union and MoneyGram, and we ask that users decline sending payment in cases where these are the only methods of payment offered by the seller. Generally, if payment is sent using an instant cash wire transfer service and the item is not delivered as promised, no recourse is available for recovering funds. In most cases, an escrow service should be used when purchasing high dollar value items. More information on the benefits and risks of individual payment methods can be found at:

http://pages.ebay.com/help/pay/payment.html

eBay urges caution when purchasing high-priced items, especially if the price seems too good to be true.

Remember that you can always check the My Messages section of My eBay to see if a message from us is legitimate. Copies of any emails we send you about the status of your account or a change in your account information will be displayed in My Messages. This is especially helpful since many spoof emails try to convince you that your account is in jeopardy.

***Important***
*Never* respond to a suspicious email or click any links in the email message. If you think you may have given out personal information in a spoof email or website, you need to take steps to protect your identity right away. For more information about what to do, go to: http://pages.ebay.com/help/confidence/problems-identity-theft.html

If you'd like to learn more about how to spot a spoof email and stay safe online, go to: http://pages.ebay.com/help/tutorial/accountprotection/js_tutorial.html

Keep those reports coming -- you're helping protect the global Internet community! Our Trust & Safety team works closely with Internet Service Providers to shut down fraudulent sites. We also send your reports to Web browser companies so that they can develop tools to identify spoof sites.

We are committed in making your eBay experience pleasant and fulfilling.

Sincerely,
Ira

eBay Customer Support

I quite frankly don't know what to say about that. Except for, of course, question everything.

The Universe is Just Awesome

I have a script that runs every day at 05:00 on my primary computer (a Linux box playfully named nostradamus) that hits one of NASA's public-facing webservers and retrieves the picture of the day, sets it as my desktop background, and archives the previous picture of the day for later reference. It's lovely to be able to wake up every morning to a brand new astonomy-themed picture of the day, especially when they look like this:

Grab your 3D specs, 'cause that's a way-cool stereoscopic picture of the moon.

Or like this:

Dark sand cascades on Mars. Star Trek seems so underwhelming faced with this.

But this morning I noted that my desktop background was somewhat barren. I checked the cron job, reran the script, and still had nothing. So I went to the site myself and was startled to find that the picture of the day was not a picture at all, but instead this lovely video of the known universe:



Science is awesome.

The Irreligious Give Aid

A criticism that is frequently leveled against the godless is that we believe in nothing save ourselves, or that we're only out for number one. Although examples of such solipsistic individuals surely exist, it's a ludicrous generalisation, and one that doesn't really warrant a response other than a slow, sad shake of the head.

The missus and I have lunch every December with a group of her family friends. Although we used to exchange gifts, it was decided that this time 'round we would donate to charity—a decision that was lauded by all. Unfortunately, the charity that they chose (being fairly serious Christians as well as folks who don't generally think about these sorts of things) was World Vision.

World Vision is an international partnership of Christians whose mission is to follow our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ in working with the poor and oppressed to promote human transformation, seek justice, and bear witness to the good news of the Kingdom of God. [From their mission statement. Emphasis added.]

I'd prefer that none of my money goes toward proselytism. While the envelope was being passed around, I pulled out my iPhone and made a donation to UNICEF, instead.

For those of you who haven't yet heard about the massive earthquake that killed upwards of 200,000 people last week . . . well, now you have. If you have some money to spare, I urge you to go to givingaid.richarddawkins.net and donate whatever you can. It will save lives, will serve the secondary purpose of reminding those in need of reminders that we, too, care about the safety and happiness of others. Perhaps even more than some deities I know.

Via Pharyngula.

Libel Reform

As many of you are no doubt aware, British libel laws are a joke. They demand that the defendent prove that the statements that he or she made were not libellous, rather than letting the burden of proof rest on the claimant. This is a guilty-until-proven-innocent system, and is frequently used to promote a chilling effect on free speech, as in the case of Simon Singh, an English reporter who was recently sued by the British Chiropractic Association for calling their treatments "bogus". Which they are.

This free speech issue affects us all the more because of so-called libel tourism, which means that if you're a Canadian blogger, publishing to an American webserver, and you happen to offend someone in the United Kingdom, they can sue you in their courts.

But there is hope. You can go to libelreform.org and sign their petition to support free speech.

This is important. Defend your right to question everything.

Charlie Sheen was Unimpressed

I heart Randal Munroe:

God of the Gaps

Oh, Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal, you make me smile...

Tip-o'-the-tentacle to Gary Barbon.

The Bottom Line

From zero-point energy cranks, to those who just want to mess around with magnets, there have always been nutcases who want a free lunch. Some of these folks are actually self-deluded enough to think that the second law of thermodynamics is just a suggestion, but the rest of them simply want their free lunch (and beach house) to come at the expense of investors who fall for their flim-flam.

For those few of you who have never laid eyes upon the genius of Maurits Cornelius Escher, I present to you one of his most famous works, and a remarkably elegant response to those who propose perpetual motion in a closed system:

A visual representation of the mental gymnastics these kooks are forced to go through.

Either you're fooling yourself, or you're trying to fool someone else. It's an illusion, and that's the bottom line.

Music

After waiting for far too long, Bryan Steeksma's music is now available on both iTunes and CDBaby. If you're not interested in downloading the whole album, my favourites are I Am the Satellite and The Galaxy's Elegant Cinema.

Also, don't forget to check out the new song from Symphony of Science. Plus their newly redesigned website is sweet!



And, as always, there's Tim Minchin.

PZ Myers Visits Winnipeg!

The inimitable Professor PZ Myers visited Winnipeg last weekend to speak to the local humanist group, the Humanist Association of Manitoba (HAM). I hadn't been aware that we even had a local humanist group until he announced it on his blog; perhaps I'll join. The event was open to the public, and was even announced in the Winnipeg Free Press (where the headline writer spelled "atheist" wrong), so the attendance was excellent. I managed to secure a seat for myself and the missus. Let me tell you about it!

To be fair, it was spelled correctly in the body of the article.

First off, if you've never heard PZ speak, you're missing out. He's insightful, warm, and often hilarious. In fact, have a listen! He's been a guest on The Non-Prophets, The Skeptics' Guide to the Universe, and several other shows to whom I'm too lazy to link (they're probably not as good, anyhow). I've been a huge fan of Professor Myers ever since Dawkins referred to his Courtier's Reply in the second printing of The God Delusion. Although I'd heard much of what he presented before, in various forms, his talk was far from disappointing.

The following is reconstituted from the copious notes that I took during the presentation. Please bear with me.

The War Between Science and Religion

Before PZ is introduced, Donna Harris spends a few minutes talking about the background of HAM. She pronounces "human" just like Carl Sagan did, which makes me smile. We're told that this group has an elected executive membership, and they have both atheist and theist speakers (Muslim, Baha'i, etc.) on a monthly basis. It's a good way to contribute to society in a meaningful and irreligious way. Once that's done, she gives Professor Myers his usual intro, and we're off to the races.

PZ begins by expressing his disappointment that Canadians always seem to invite him to speak in January. He thinks that we want him to head back home sure to tell all the other Americans how horrible it is, so that they don't feel the need to come up here ourselves. The Americans with whom I've spoken all seem to think that Canada is outright terrified of their insanity—which is fair, because many of us find their insanity quite startling, as I've mentioned in passing before. But let's be fair about this: we have our own crazies up here. Just ask Martin Wagner. I wonder how that all turned out. But I digress.

Despite the title of his talk, Professor Myers opines that he doesn't think that "war" is an appropriate word for what's going on between science and religion. The movement (or movements: the New Atheism, scientific scepticism, humanism) is (are) peaceful. We're not out to cause trouble: simply speaking our minds is sufficient. "Education," he says, "not punching." But rhetoric is just fine. He makes one of my favourite points: All people are deserving of respect, but the same is not so for all ideas.

The United States has a peculiar problem with creationism, he goes on (although this problem is not limited to the U.S.: Canada also has a creation museum). PZ states that religion is the source of this problem. (This is a common theme of his talk, and I find myself not necessarily in complete agreement with him—we can talk socio-economic circumstances, lack of funding for science education, and just plain intellectual laziness—but I certainly concur that religion exacerbates just about any undesirable situation.)

Like me, PZ is a fan of bizarre anti-intellectual nonsense. (My flaming rhetoric on everything from iridology to Mormonism are legendary around my office, and employees have taken to claiming to be Scientologists and such whenever they want to kick back, relax, and hear me rant for a while instead of doing work. One of the developers recently told a new employee that if he ever wanted to take a half-hour break all he had to do was ask me about homeopathy.) PZ gives the example of Bishop Ussher, who worked out, as Pratchett and Gaiman put it, that the Earth is a Libra. He also says something that at first is mildly puzzling: that he somewhat admires Ussher. The man was thinking, he goes on, and that's something to encourage. But, three and a half centuries later, thinking has moved on, and those who still believe Ussher was right no longer have any excuse.

The early creationists were scholarly, Professor Myers continues. This has changed. They were not so literally-minded, back then. He talks briefly about Inherit the Wind, and how distastefully inaccurate it was in its portrayal of William Jennings Bryan, who accepted an old Earth, and was very liberal-minded—in stark contrast with the ludicrous likes of Ken Ham and Ray Comfort. Liberal as he was, though, he was still wrong, and although the good guys lost (something few people remember, actually) the Scopes Trial humiliated creationism, and they decided to try another tactic: they went "scientific".

PZ goes on to speak of George McCreedy Price, who went on a crusade to promote his Seventh Day Adventist creation ideas, which were quite literal. He promoted a "back to the Bible" mentality, and it gradually gained credence among creationists. The Genesis Flood basically founded modern young Earth creationism, although it was little more than a reiteration of Ellen White's Seventh-day Adventist beliefs without actually mentioning the cult.

He goes on to describe the several various types of creationism that one is likely to encounter:

• Day-age Theory: Old Earth. Genesis is metaphorical, with each "day" representing millions or billions of years.
• Gap Theory: Old Earth. Genesis is literal, but incomplete. The days were not necessarily contiguous: that is, there may have been "gaps" of indeterminate lengths between each creation event.
• Scientific Creationism: Young Earth. Literal Genesis. Noah's flood is the cause of just about every aspect of geology.
• Literal Creationism: Literal. More Bible, less science (and more Ken Ham!).
• Intelligent Design (ID): Wants to change science to include supernatural phenomena. Discovery Institute. Pretends to be secular.

PZ then quotes William Dembski of the Discovery Institute: "Intelligent design is just the Logos theology of John's Gospel restated in the idiom of information theory." Sigh.

PZ mentions the Gablers and calls the textbook publishers that caved to them craven. Laughs. He mentions Don McLeroy, creationist dentist and former head of the Texas State Board of Education. More laughs. He touches briefly on Sarah Palin (although not on her recent Fox News deal—WTF?). More laughs, but strained now. He then calls Ken Ham an Australopithecine. Many, many laughs.

He moves on the Creation Museum (the American one, not ours). PZ points out that, unlike just about any other museum on the face of the planet, the Creation Museum isn't a wide-open, explore-as-you-will venue. There is only one path. Or, to put it as Professor Myers so eloquently did: "This isn't a museum—it's a haunted house!" The main thrust of the museum seems to be that evolution causes abortions, violence, and death. PZ presents a picture of a wrecking ball smashing through the wall of a church, the wrecking ball labelled "millions of years". Apparently thinking of things on a geological or evolutionary time-scale is the work of the Devil.

The main theme of the museum, repeated ad nauseam, is "Same Facts, Different Views". Professor Myers also points out that to these folks, calling a person educated seems to be an insult. False equivalence is thrown up all over the place: this guy's crazy ideas are just as valid as this scientist's hypotheses. More crazy, actually, as it's human reason versus God's word.

(If you're interested in an in-depth Creation Museum walkthrough, Jen's got an excellent, comprehensive, and hilarious one over at Blag Hag. I may do something similar with the Canadian version at some point. But I digress...)

PZ presents some heartwarming news: there have been legal successes over the last few years. Unfortunately, the net result, apparently, is that we're still losing: we're losing the war of public opinion. According to a recent poll (I missed the attribution, if there was one), 44% of respondents say that evolution is flat-out false, and 66% say that some version of creationism is true (I'm always amused by the creationism/evolution overlap; it seems likely that much of this is due to some sort of cognitive dissonance). Also, according to PZ, about 58% of Canadians believe in evolution. (As I would later mention to him, I find this startling: I thought we were doing much, much better than that!)

Professor Myers moves on to talk about state standards in science education. The conclusion: they're in pretty bad shape. I wish that he'd been a little more topical, however, and talked about science education in Canada. Mine wasn't fantastic, to be honest, and I went to a pretty excellent public school.

What's the root of our problem? Myers' answer is "RELIGION". (Honestly, I agree. But I think that I'd say "dogma and ideology", rather than "religion"—but that may simply be a matter of framing. Recognising that you—yes, you—can make mistakes, major ones, and committing to follow the evidence wherever it leads is a wonderfully eye-opening experience.)

But PZ continues. Why should religion be a problem? He talks about Stephen Jay Gould and NOMA, which is all well and good in principle (so long as the religious don't go making testable claims, I'd interject)—but the problem is that (a) religious people aren't very good moral authorities, and (b) they interfere with science!

Here's the problem, as PZ sees it:

1. We're dealing with competing ways of knowing. Observation and experimentation (scepticism!) versus dogma and revelation. We can't accept the latter.
2. Religion is epistemically empty and unverifiable. In other words, there's really no way to test anything Ken Ham says. (Actually, several of his claims have been tested, and have failed those tests.)
3. Religion is ridiculous. (Several more laughs, here.) God impregnating a virgin with a son who is also him, etc. (He doesn't talk about substitutionary absolution, which is a major absurdity that I mention often.) He compares the Bible to Star Wars: it's an interesting story, but there's no reason that we ought to accept it.

So why is religion so popular?

1. Tradition. PZ was brought up Lutheran (just like the missus!), and those family traditions feel good!
2. Fear. Fundamentalism is all hellfire and brimstone. As Grand Moff Tarkin put it: "Fear will keep them in line." Not only are these folks are terrified of Hell, they're terrified of missing out on Heaven.
3. Tribalism. Religion helps us distinguish "us" from "the other". Professor Myers points to Ireland: it's far too simplistic to say that the problems there are the result of religion alone, but it does make for an easy identifier. It sets people apart.

(I was slightly disappointed that PZ doesn't mention "community", which I think would be at the top of the totem pole, there. You make your friends in church. You go out to brunch afterward. It's where you organise trips, food drives, play-dates, and the like. That's a major draw, and I think also the source of the common question that we hear from theists: "If you get rid of religion, what do you replace it with." Although I'm not an especially community-oriented fellow, I can understand the draw of such an organisation in the abstract, and the common atheist refrain of "If you get rid of a tumor, what do you replace it with?" is humorous, but unhelpful to these people.)

PZ again stresses that we're not trying to destroy religion. He enumerates what he sees as the current failings of the movement:

1. We tend toward a passive, defensive strategy.
2. We tend to emphasise litigation, but what if we lose a court case (if Scalia were presiding for example)?
3. The "Ken Miller effect": in many places we're reinforcing what we should oppose. Jerry Coyne will never be invited to speak in court, because it might associate science with atheism, and so those who make it their job to reconcile religion and science are really the only ones anyone sees.
4. Protecting the classroom while ignoring the culture is doomed to failure—kids listen more to their parents than to their teachers. (At least, the younger ones do.)

What are we going to do about religion? Fight back. But don't actually fight, of course. Professor Myers talks about the Atheist Bus Campaign, and remarks upon how surprisingly easy it is to annoy pundits with what really amounts to very polite expression of a differing opinion. (It is delightfully easy to ruffle feathers!)

PZ talks briefly about Expelled. (I always love hearing about this, but I won't cover it here, as it's really flogging a dead horse at this point. If you don't know what I'm talking about, use Google.)

PZ talks about the OUT Campaign (I preen a little in my seat, as I'm wearing my OUT Campaign hoodie). He encourages us to question things (he mentions Becki Jayne Harrelson's "hot" painting of Jesus and Judas and the college group that gained national media attention by simply asking "Did Jesus have a homosexual relationship?"). He plugs the Blasphemy Challenge. He speaks of the Great Desecration: Catholics were upset that he tortured Jesus. He quotes: "You [sic] act is more deplorable than Hitlers' [sic] Holocaust or the terrorists on 9-11."

He finishes with a Darwin quotation, encouraging us to conscientiously express our convictions, to use passion, personality, and humour in our interactions, to stay true to science, and to act!

Questions

I'm fourth in line at the mic when the floor is opened for questions, and the missus tells me that many people were chattering and pointing jealously at my limited edition OUT Campaign hoodie, which (sadly, as the zipper on mine is broken) is out of print.

The first fellow mentions Francis Collins, but seems to think he's an ID proponent. (Well, in a way he is, but not really.) PZ disagrees with his characterisation of Collins, but concurs that the man does far too much promotion of religion. The fellow steps back from the mic after encouraging everyone to google Sam Harris.

The second questioner talks about hope. They (religions) have hope to offer. What hope can we offer? They've got Martin Luther King Jr., etc. What do we do? PZ reminds him that religion promises hope but doesn't deliver. It's hope built on a lie. We won't make false promises. I thought he was going to leave it here and not mention the most important bit, but Professor Myers goes on to say that science is hope. Look at everything it's accomplished! "Why are there so many peple in this room?" he asks. "Because you didn't die!" Science has done so much for us. What has religion done?

The third question pertains to morality, and isn't exceptionally interesting. Commandment-style morality isn't really moral. It's important to look at the real consequences of your actions!

I'm fourth, and if I may be allowed a moment of self congratulation, I managed to push through the anxiety generated by actually speaking to someone whom I admire so greatly and ask my question with some composure.

I said: "We don't have a constitutional separation of church and state in Canada, although de facto we seem to for the most part, with the exception of the [public!] Catholic school boards in Ontario and such like... Do you think that we might benefit from such a thing, or would it be a detriment to us."

He replied: "I don't think it would be a benefit at all. One of things I'm trying to get across here is that right now we're using it as this bulwark to prevent them from being in the schools, and that's fine. But what's allowed to have happen is this... this false confidence that lets us think we're managing the problem just by putting up this legal barrier, and it doesn't. People don't care about legal barriers! They try their best to work around them.So the fact that you don't have it, I think, is a good thing. Because what it means is that when you have to deal with this problem, the way you're going to deal with it is that you're going to sit down and you're going to work it out together; you're not going to go running to the lawyers.

Me: "Hm."

PZ: "Now it could get real bad if the creationists get real organised—watch out for that—and that means that in Canada's case you've got to be a bit more proactive, you've got to get out there early. Don't wait until the problem becomes academic. That's the advice I would give you."

Thanks, PZ!

I had just shaved, unfortunately, so was unable to compare beards with him. Don't worry, the beard is back now.

There were dozens of questions, and I won't go through all of them here. Only one was from a creationist, and the missus and I were very impressed with how he handled it: he was affable but direct, and he answered all of the man's questions. Although I am a great fan of Dawkins, Professor Myers is far better in this situation, I think.

I'll leave you with one more thing. By far the best quotation of the night goes to Professor Myers, in responding to the final question of the evening: "A purity ring is a signal that says, 'Yes, I like anal.'" Much laughter and applause.

Quotation

Are you sure the Law of Infinitesimals refers to dilution and not the IQ of adherents to this theory?

—Perry DeAngelis